


5 times Hermann wasn't a monster + 1 he was

by curiumKingyo



Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: 5+1 Things, AU, Athene Noctua Verse, wing!Hermann
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-12
Updated: 2014-03-12
Packaged: 2018-01-15 10:40:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1301929
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/curiumKingyo/pseuds/curiumKingyo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>During his entire life Hermann has been called a monster, even if he never acted like one. Except that one time he did.</p>
            </blockquote>





	5 times Hermann wasn't a monster + 1 he was

**Author's Note:**

  * For [pickleplum](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pickleplum/gifts).



> This idea hit me today in the bus and thanks to my new phone I got half of it done even before I reached home! :D  
> The weird formatting is because I don't know how to fix the phone's formating here. But it's onlt the first two parts, the rest looks fine D:
> 
> As usual, this fic belongs to the universe created by [pickleplum](http://archiveofourown.org/users/pickleplum/pseuds/pickleplum) and will be better understood if you are acquainted with their series [Owl and Dragon](http://archiveofourown.org/series/69890).

**01)**

He didn't even know what  the word means when he was first called  it.  He actually thought  it was a cute  word for "son", since he always heard it hushed  in his father's voice or read it in his mother's lips when they were talking abou thim. He was seven when he found out its true meaning. Dietrich and Karla were watching one of those japanese series with big robots and weird creatures when he heard it. The   hero  in  red divesuit j ust  looked  at  their enemy  and said " We'll defeat you ,  m onster!"

Dietrich  cheered  and Karla  faked uninterest  but  her  eyes  shone when  t he girl in  yellow uniform gave  a  really  cool but  unrealistic kick  in one of  t he  creatures .

Hermann  didn't understand why  t he  heroes  were  calling  t heir  fo e  with  such  a tender term . Frowning ,  h e  poked  h is  brother's arm  and  asked  " Trich ,  why a re they calling  this  creatures  'monster s '?"

Dietrich  looked  d own at him  confused . " Because that's what  they a re ,  Manny ." He  sa id , rising h is  eye brows.  Hermann's reaction wasn't  one  h e was  expecting :  h e  suddenly looked  as  confused  as a 7  year old could  which was unusual for him . " Manny , do  you know what  'monster'  mean ?"

Hermann  looked between mortified  and  doubtful . By  their side , Karla  finally spoke , eyes  not leaving  t he  screen : "Monster "  She  s aid. " Is  this  kind  of  thing .  Ugly ,  evil ,  unhuman things ."

She squealed  when Dietrich  punched her  in  t he  arm .  She  turned to face  h im  with  fire burning  in  her  eyes, but it  died quickly  when  she saw Hermann's small  figure  quickly leaving  t he  room , wings  flapping uselessly trying  to  make  him move  faster away from  t he  ugly ,  unhuman truth .

** 02) **

"This kid is a monster!" His tutor said in a barely restrained voice. Hermann's eyes were huge with apprehension, hands balled in tiny fists over his lap. His father was staring down at him as disapprovingly as always.

"I'm terribly sorry, Mrs.  Schroeter ." Lars said, lips pursed.

"He not only never does what I ask him, but also keeps  interrupting  me to  correct  me." She stressed the words, showing just how offended she was. Hermann tried to shrink in his seat and take even less space than he usually does but that didn't protect him from his father's hand, heavily clamping his shoulder. 

"Please, accept my apologies." He said, fingers digging in the boy's bony shoulder. "He's been impossible in these last months."

"Raising four kids alone is not an easy task." The woman said gravely. "Perhaps a boarding school would fix it?"

Lars shook his head. "I'm afraid not. If even under my gaze he behaves like that I can hardly imagine what he'd do away from me."

She made a noise that was mostly approving. "I'm sure you do your best, Doctor Gottlieb. And your wife's passing away is still recent, I'm certain you'll manage him." Lars nodded and his hand finally left Hermann's shoulder. "In any way, I'm not sure any respectable school would accept this little monster..."

** 03) **

It wasn't his fault. It never was but he felt like everyone thought differently. By now he should have known better, but when  Doctor Munro kept on using inaccurate measures and completely messing with what could be a very simple and enjoyable class, h e couldn't keep his mouth shut.

Now the entire class had extra work just because their professor's ego was bruised. Hermann felt his colleagues'  eyes burning into the back of his head. He could almost feel their gaze tearing into the feathers of his wings, claiming them as reward for putting up with him.

Damn, even  Edan  Reid was looking at him with a more than intense glare. 'Goodbye chances of having friends', Hermann thought. 'Goodbye chances of having  Edan  Reid as a friend..."

He didn't want to leave the room first, even if he had answered his  questions  long before anyone else made a move to leave. The first one to stand up and place the exercise sheet over the professor's desk was a short but bulky guy he rarely saw in class. T he man passed by his side and made sure to elbow him, hitting the  upcurve  of his  binded  wing quite painfully. He whined a bit and that just made the man look bitterly at him: "Stop whining! I'm late for my next class because of you, you monster."

** 04) **

Months after his first, and only, kiss he was still an emotional mess. Thanks to Dietrich he could at least tell  Edan  he tru ly loved him and that he was tru ly sorry that things went the way they did. O n one hand, he was happy that he got to hear his thick accent one last time, on the other, he was heartbroken by the fact that after that last call  Edan  never tried to contact him again.

Surely he begged the other boy not to, deep inside he feared for what his Father would do If he caught  Edan  anywhere near him, but  Edan  said he loved him too. He gave up so easily...

Hermann looked down at the  scars on his thin wrist. If he closed his eyes, he could still feel the blood dripping, the life flowing out of him through the deep gashes he dug into his own flesh. Now, despite his inner turmoil, he could see how desperate and insane he was to even try something like that. Even i f once in a while he wished he had succeeded, most of the time he was just too grateful that Dietrich and Karla found him and saved him that night.

By now he knew them by heart. The crisscross pattern etched in raised white lines over his pale grey skin. It looked like a wild animal had attacked him; sharp teeth and long claws against a literally bird-boned boy. It looked like a monster had done that to him. In more ways than one, he thought it was what actually happened.

** 05) **

Newt was almost asleep in the couch when the loud boom of a thunder echoed through the room. He jumped off the cushions, blindly reaching for whatever has closest. It happened to be  Tendo , who had been watching The Witch Blair Project with him. The power was off and they could hear the raging storm even inside the  Shatterdome's  thick walls. With only emergency lights flicking in dull shades of orange it was very difficult to see what was around them.

Suddenly, watching an horror movie in a rainy night didn't seem like his brightest idea. He'd be dead if he was to admit just how fucking anxious he was, with flashes of the movie passing before his eyes every time he blinked.

He was slowly letting go of  Tendo's  arm when he heard it. An uneven sound, dry and echoing, coming closer and closer. His heart was torn between jumping off his throat and stopping completely. His hand closed back around his friend's forearm, and he heard him moaning in annoyance. The sound was very close now, a thump followed by a  long dragging sound, and then another thump and so on.

The weak lights delineated an indescribable creature coming through the corridor.  "It's a monster!"  Newt squeaked when it finally came into the room.

"What are you two doing here?" The very familiar voice asked from the threshold.

Tendo  shoved him aside. "What do you mean, 'monster' you dork? It's only Hermann..."

He playfully shoved  Tendo  too.  "Isn't it the same?"

** +1) **

He was tired and frustrated and at least once in his life he wanted to use this as an excuse. The last  Kaiju  attack had been vicious like none before. They almost lost a Jaeger and one of the pilots was terribly injur ed . He was in his worst mood since he left his Father's house. T he kind of mood in which he doesn't want to deal with Newton.

But of course that was the exact day Newt decides to cross the line. Literally.

The biologist had spent his whole afternoon away, which was great while it lasted. But as soon as he came back, Newt went straight to Hermann's side of the lab, all giggly and excited.

" Hermy ! You'll never guess what I just did!" He was skipping from foot to foot in a very cartoonish way. Hermann sighed deeply and looked at him, trying his best to show in his face how dangerous he w as to deal with at that moment. "Yeah, so, since you'll never guess right, I'll be nice and spare you the effort."

He got ridiculously closer, invading Hermann's personal space like he belonged there. Then he unbuttoned his cuffs and rolled his sleeve up, revealing a mosaic of greys in his  skin. Hermann frowned, Newt always looked like the kind of person that would want to make a tattoo but would never get around to actually doing it.

The smaller man's forearm was still covered in plastic film, straight from the parlor. For a split second Hermann felt proud to be the first one Newt showed his tattoos to, but when he realized the subject depicted he felt his stomach drop and burn. He stood up abruptly, cane falling from its usual place hooked at the desk's edge.

"What exactly does this mean, Doctor  Geiszler ?" He towered over Newt, who looked absolutely  surprised. "Are you out of your  kaiju  groupie mind? Don't you know people wake up everyday fearing it could be their last because of these... monsters? Don't you know what we do here?!"

His neck was straining, tendons t ight  and high under his firmly clenched jaw. His teeth were gritting and he felt a vein pulsing in his temple. His usually pale cheeks were red and hot with anger.

"I don't even know anymore why are you here. You're always playing and being obnoxious and inconvenient.  I lost count of how many damage you made to our lab with your slushing entrails and barely contained fumes. And now, to top this all, you just made yourself a walking monument to the very beings you should be helping to destroy! This is not even ridiculous anymore, Newton..."

His chest was wav ing and his heart was pumping so hard he was afraid his fragile ribs wouldn't resist. He took a deep breath through his nose and looked down at Newton who was a perfect picture of confusion and hurt. In any other day he'd feel terrible and apologize immediately. But today he couldn't help but to feel a little better looking at Newt's hurtful expression.

He pivoted with as much grace as he could muster and picked his cane before limping out of the lab. By the time he reached his bedroom, the anger had faded and all the stress and frustration turned into a bone deep tiredness. When he finally took his clothes and binds off he felt like sleeping for a whole day.

Before he could lay down, his eye caught in the reflexive surface of his notebook's screen. He saw his ghostly grey form, bones and sad eyes under disheveled wings. The memory of Newt's face struck him hard and if he wasn't so utterly tired he'd put the binds back and get dressed again just to go beg for his friend's  forgiveness.

But as he was, all he could do was forcefully close his eyes and go to sleep, knowing full well what a monster he was.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Not Everyone Agrees](https://archiveofourown.org/works/1360429) by [pickleplum](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pickleplum/pseuds/pickleplum)
  * [Inhuman](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7411831) by [pickleplum](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pickleplum/pseuds/pickleplum)
  * [Tutor](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7498545) by [pickleplum](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pickleplum/pseuds/pickleplum)
  * [Constants](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7642861) by [pickleplum](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pickleplum/pseuds/pickleplum)




End file.
